Not with a bang, but indeed with a fizzle
by Love and Hate and Sex and Pain
Summary: After the explosive silver parachutes go off and kill Prim, Katniss is mourning. She and Peeta need to find a way out of the Capital. But will the unexpected appearance of a fellow victor change their path? DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN'T READ MICKINGJAY!


MockingJay- fanfiction

IT STARTS OFF AFTER THE EXPLOSIONS IN THE CITY CIRCLE OF THE CAPITAL

I see Prim, bright and beautiful, shimmering and happy. She is leading me through a meadow like the one back home in district 12, except the grass here is much taller. She is laughing, her back turned to me. When we are almost to our destination, a willow tree, Prim stops. She turns to me with horrified eyes, and her mouth open. The sky turns dark. The world goes silent. It's pitch black. All of the sudden, the sky lights up with what at first glance seems to be fire works. My hearing has gone and a constant ring replaces it. Now I know that these are not fire works at all, they are explosions. Suddenly I am in the city circle, my vision blurry and lopsided. The world spins and swoops and finally slows enough for me to make out Prim. Sweet Prim. Only something is wrong. And I realize that it is only part of her. Her head.

I let some kind a scream mixed with a wimper. Prim. Prim's head. Her blonde hair stained with flesh and blood. Her body blown to bits. As I take in the scene, I feel someone grabbing me. "NO!" I cry. I turn to see Peeta's shocked face. When he speaks his voice has a sickening saddness.

"Katniss, come on. We have to get out of here."

"But Prim. She's-" he puts his finger on my lips.

"I know, but we have to go."

I can't speak through the lump in my throat. I just have to trust Peeta on this. All I can do besides that is nod. He takes me by the arm and leads me away. We head onto one of the smaller streets people have just abanded. We run into three Peacekeepers, but easily take them out. We pick a house but when we try to open the door, it's locked.

"Stand back." says Peeta. He takes a few steps back, stops, and then sprints tward the door as fast as he can on his artificial leg. He knocks into the door with his right shoulder and it swings open.

"Wow." I say with a hollow voice.

"Uh-huh." He breaths out.

We enter and close the door behind us. Only the door won't stay closed. We end up moving the heaviest thing in the room, a solid metal coffee table, infront of the it. We move through out the downstairs like hunters. Like me and Gale.

"Gale!" I say unexpectedly.

"What?"

"He was taken by Peacekeepers! We have to go ba-" I don't get to finish my sentence because Peeta throws his hand over my mouth.

"Shh." He looks at the ceiling. I must have missed a detail because of the ringing, but now it has subsided. I listen closer. Creaking. Someone is upstairs.

"Stay here." I say as I draw an arrow from the sheath and place it on the bow string. I walk silently up the stairs. I walk down the narrow hall way until I come to the end, turn to the left, and let the arrow fly straight into a man's heart. I feel a pang of emotions. Now this man is gone, just like Prim. And Gale is probably gone to. I sink to the floor. Prims gone. Dead. Her hollow eyes stared right at me. A tear wells over the edge of my eye. It leaves it's trail on my cheek.

I find myself in the fetal position. I hear more noise. I don't care. Peeta can manage that. But then I feel hands sliding under me and lifting me up. Warm hands. Peeta lifts me onto his lap and holds me. Then I start to really sob. He holds me until I have cried myself out. I drift off.

It is a dreamless sleep. All I can see is Prim's sad face staring at me, disconnected from her body. The only image floating in my mind. Not even Gale wiggles his way into my subconscious. Just Prim.

I wake to find that I have been moved down the hall, and into the living room. I sit up to find I am on a deep red velvet couch. I run my fingers over the material, remembering the velvet collar of my mother's dress. I look around the room. Bright artificial colors jump out at me. There are two more couches in the room; both velvet. One is an unnatural yellow, and the other a neon green. The carpet is rosy pink, and so are the walls. A large TV is stationed on the far wall above the green couch. A large window directly across from me. A vase of sweet smelling flowers sits to my left. A large door way looms on the wall to my left as well. Along with the yellow couch. Peeta enters carrying a handful of canned food. My eyes land on lamb stew.

"I thought you might want this." He says handing me the lamb stew.

I stare at it. Peeta takes a seat next to me. "Could you open it?" I ask.

"Sure" He pulls out a knife. I hadn't realized how hungery I am.

He penetrates the top and cuts a circle around the edge.

For a while we just sit and eat. Not talking, or even looking at each other. I think back to Prim. Her last secconds alive. Helping the children with the explosive parachutes. What I could have done to save her. But in the end, it just seems pointless. I couldn't have done anything even if I had been right next to her.

I decide I want to look for more food when the TV screen flickers on. It's president Snow. I had completely forgotten about him. And my mission to behead him...

He is in his office. He is speaking but I don't pay attention. I just imagine killing him. I am suddenly filled with rage. I keep killing him in my mind until I hear him say,"The rebels have been Defeated," his overly plump lips curl into a smile. "I will grant Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark immunity..." his snake-like eyes narrow. "under the condition that they are tributes in each Hunger Games from here on until they die. If they end up being the last two, they can both live." his expression changes to something more serious. "If they have both killed something other than an animal. That will be all."

My mind flies. We are going into the the next arena. And the one after that. And after that. And on until we die. We are the only ones who will be granted immunity. What about Haymitch? Why would president Snow do that? Maybe because he wants to watch us fight to the death over and over. I continue this train of thought until Peeta inturrupts.

"Oh my god." His mouth hangs slightly open. His expression is blank. His blue eyes stare into my gray ones. I surprise myself by pulling him into a hug. But I guess it does make sense. After all we have been through together. And also our current situation. It's all to much. Prim's death. Gale being beaten for information. Peeta and I having to enter the arena over and over. I wish I had been killed in the first arena. Then Peeta would be safely home in district 12, Prim would be alive, Gale would be safe. The only cost would be Peeta's broken heart. Or would they be safe at all? I will never know.

I pull away, my hands still on Peeta's shoulders. "What now?"

"Well I guess we show ourselves. Play in the Games. Be forever made to kill. Unless the pres was bluffing." He looks at my lips. "Or refuse to play. Or kill ourselves before they can get to us."

I am taken back by his suggestion. But it would make sense. It seems like a good enough idea. "I lost my poisen pill."

"We could hang ourselves." He says in a small voice. We find some rope. We make nuses. I connect them to the railing on the top of the stairs, then we get on chairs. We take one last look at each other. Before we go, I take his hand in mine.

"Stay with me?" I say.

"Always." He says looking me right in the eyes.

Just as we are about to kick over the chairs, we hear the sirens.

chapter 2

We stop imediatly. We take the ropes off our necks and get off the chairs. Then we hear Claudius Templesmith's booming voice.

"Go to your basement immediatly. Gasmasks will be available. I repeat, go to your basements."

With out thinking, Peeta and I run through the door labeled 'basement' and race down the stairs. The door closes automatically behind us. We take a minute to catch our breath. He speaks first.

"Do you think this could be a trick?" he says in a huff.

I nod, not because I think so, I know so. I know this could very well be a trick. It would be more than expected. "Let's put on the masks."

We put them on eachother. All of the sudden, I feel the house shake.

"What's going on out there?" He says.

"Gas bombs, maybe." I reply. I look at his blue eyes, those reliable blue eyes. Even when he was trying to act like he felt no pain, his eyes reflected it. Those eyes that have watched over me.

I try to make a plan of what needs to happen. I definantly don't want to go to back to being a tribute. I can't risk going in to find Gale; who knows what would happen. We need to get back to district 13. But what would happen when we got back? Would Peeta and I be killed? Shackeled to a wall and beaten like my prep team was for stealing a couple slices of bread? Or would we be welcomed back? I doubt that. Maybe we could make a go of it in the woods. Yes, I think we could. I make a mental note to remember to bring as much supplies as we can carry. I turn to Peeta who is now leaning against a wall.

"I know what we need to do" I say confidently.

"What?" He's says eagerly.

"If we can find a way out of the city, we could travel far into the woods. We would have to bring as much supplies as we could, though." I think a moment. He hangs on my words. "Do you think the guy who lived here had a tent?" I ask.

"Maybe. But why would someone in the capital have a tent?"

"I don't know. Maybe he had some morbid fantasy of going into the Games and coming out a victor." I say, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

"Actually, I wouldn't be surprised with these lunitics here in the capital. But, Katniss, where would he have it if it isn't in the basement?" he asks as he surveys the seemingly empty room.

"A closet?"

We wait until the sirens upstairs stop. Peeta leads the way upstairs, insistant he needs to protect me from some unknown danger. We look in all the closets. We've almost given up hope when Peeta discovers an unlocked safe in the master bedroom behind a painting of my mockingjay pin. Ugh. These people. Peeta carefully opens it and I guess the odds are in our favor because we find a bounty of camping equipment. A tent, flash lights and batteries, dried beef, dried fruit, cantines, and heat reflecting sleeping bags. Even a coupe pairs of those night-vision glasses. We also find a few duffel bags. Almost to good to be true. We fill the duffel bags with the supplies. We find more food like cookies and even a roasted pig. We wrap the pig in plastic. We find loads of matches and stuff those in the duffel bags as well. We decide before we move out that we need to shower this makeup off our faces and dress more appropriately for living in the woods. We find that the guy I killed was married, when we survey his clothing closet. They must have both had a morbid obsession, because they each have heat reflecting unitards, camoflage jackets, hunting boots, and fuzy wool socks. After we shower we dress, and after we dress we make an exit plan.

"We could go through the sewer drain and then come up in a part of the city near the hills." Peeta suggests.

"We would need a map." I say.

"Hmm.." Peeta looks deep in thought.

We are in the kitchen downstairs, me sitting on the teal counter and Peeta leaning against it. We sit there for a while, until Peeta just about jumps out of his wool socks.

"What? What is it?" I say surprised.

"The maps we had! I still have mine! It was in my coat." He says relieved. Fortunantly, we hadn't gotten rid of them yet. We look through his coat. We find the map, only it is torn in half and somehow sopping wet. "Ugh."

"We'll find another way." I say trying to sound reassuring.

"Okay. I'm over it. We could... I don't know, umm... Well... Uhh... I got nothing. Sorry, Katniss."

"Don't apoligise. It just a waste of breath. Look just-" I stop mid-sentance. The screams and shouts outside have stopped. I didn't notice this before. It must have stopped after the shaking when we were in the basement. "What's going on outside, Peeta?"

We go over to the front door, which after actually looking at it is purple, and look through the window on it. It reminds me of when I visited 12 after the bombing. Gray snow. Sculls on the ground. Rain is beating down hard, and causing the ashes to darken and quicken their race down to the earth. It's to much.

"My name is Katniss Everdeen. My home is District 12. District 12 is gone. Prim is dead. Gale is probably dead. Finnick is dead. Peeta is alive. Distict 13 is real..." I trail off. I look at Peeta. "Did I say that out loud?" He nods. "The docter in 13 told me to do that whenever I couldn't quite make sense of things." I say sheepishly.

"Do you think it's safe to go outside?" He asks.

"Yea. But we should wait for the rain to go away." We go back up to the man's room and take off our boots and jackets. We snuggle in under the covers. It's late anyway. I fall into oblivion as Peeta runs his fingers through my hair. My head rests on his chest, above his heart.

Again, my sleep is filled with Prim. But after what seems to be eternity, my father walks through the door of my childhood house in district 12 as Prim walks out. It's the same old dream that I have had for years. Me screaming for him to get out of the mines and run. But it's useless. I am finally woken at about noon by Peeta trying to calm me. I must have been screaming again.

"It's okay, Katniss. Shh, shh." His voice is soothing, familiar. But it isn't Peeta. It's Finnick.

chapter 3

"Finnick?" I bolt up into a sitting position. I look into his sea-green eyes. My eyes devour his image. Bronze hair. Lips. Jaw line. And of course, those unforgettable eyes. "How..?"

"Peeta found me. Just in time, too. I was 2 mintues away from bleeding to death. He medicated me with pain killers and anticeptics. Bandaged me and everything." He shows me them.

"I thought you were dead." I say flatly.

"Thought I was as good as dead." he looks down when he says this.

Peeta walks in carrying disenfectants. Peroxide and neosporin and more bandages. I squint at Finnicks already-applied bandages and notice they need to be changed, badly.

"I see you two have had your reunion." Peeta says smoothly. Peeta starts to tend to Finnick, when I say I can do it. Peeta hands me the supplies without questioning it. I pour the peroxide on his lacerations caused by the reptile mutts. I spread neosporin over them and then apply the cotton bandages. Then it dawns on me as to where they could have possibly found these items.

"Where did you get these?"

"A shop in the circle that wasn't completely diminished." Peeta replies.

"Oh," I say thoughtfully. "Why didn't you tell me? I could have come with you. You could have gotten-" I can't finish that sentence. My anger is mixed with all kinds of emotions. He could have gotten killed, and then I would be alone and insane. I would be sick with worry and I wouldn't be able to control my anger and tears.

"You were asleep. I didn't want to disturb you. Katniss, I'm sorry." He says this with genuin sincerety. He must remember how I reacted that time in the first arena when he didn't answer my call and when foxface stole the nightlock and made the cannon fire. I had thought Cato killed him.

I continue applying the bandages to Finnick. I can't look at Peeta right now. All I really want to do is kill president Snow. Then a thought pops into my head. "What are we going to do with Finnick? There isn't anymore clothing."

"We will find something." Finnick says. "But do we have any time to wait until I have more strength? It took all of it to walk here with Peeta."

I think a moment._ What is the downside? President Snow finding out our location and bombing us? _No, everything has been ablitterated. Then I decide. "We will stay one more night. We need to perfect our plan, anyways."

"And, also, it's still raining." Peeta chimes in.

"It is? I didn't notice." I say confused. "I guess we will have to wait another night. Or just until the rain stops."

We spend the night scavenging the neighboring houses for more of the outfits Peeta and I found, with no luck. The next morning, I find that Finnick is feeling much better and is in fact, a lot more energetic than yesterday. I guess a good nights sleep really does do magic. Other than his wounds that still need to heal, looks almost just like he did the night of the opening chariots in second quarter quell. Except he is clothed._ Now if he could just heal super fast, we would be on our way_, I think to myself.

"I went out this morning into the ashes and found myself an outfit like yours!" Finnick practically sings.

"Did Peeta tell you our plan? Or what we have concocted so far?" I ask him.

"No. We were mainly focused on not getting burried by the remains of the Capital." He replies jokingly.

"Well," I explain to him how we are going to find a way out of the city and into the woods and figure it out from there. How we were having trouble on figuring out how exactly we are going to get out of the city. I tell him about Prim and Gale, and he puts his hand on my back in attempt to comfort me. "So... What do you think?"

"I think you have had a tough time. But I need to get back to 13 and get Annie. If she is even still alive." He says. You can hear his sorrow.

Suddenly, an idea forms in my head. "Base camp! We can go back to base camp and get one of the tele-comuni-ma-bobbers!" I say excitedly. Peeta and Finnick stare at me in silence. Finally, Peeta breaks it.

"Sounds like our only option. I say we do it." He say sounding totally nonchalant.

We pack up our stuff and add the rest of the neosporin and peroxide and bandages. We head out a little after 5 pm. The rain has stopped, leaving the ground plastered with wet ash and charcoal. We stomp through, heading the way we came. We discussed what we would do with the comunicator once we found it while packing. We decided that we would find a map of Panem instead, so that we could make our way to District 4, Finnicks home, so we could get a boat and more supplies. The boat would be so we could find another continent. In school, they never taught us about them. But I know there are seven. I just hope that the people there (if there are any) are welcoming.

It's sort of depressing, thinking back to my first visit to the capital. The building had looked like the candy in the window of the sweet shop in 12. But now it just looks like colorful rubble. Structures are hardly standing and are still smoking. It reminds me of the footage they showed of 13. Except that wasn't soggy. I think of what they might have done to Gale. But now I know he is dead. When we walk past the building he was drug into, I see that it is not even standing anymore. I feel a lump form in my throat, and try to swallow it back. It doesn't work though. I avert my gaze. The presidents mansion is not standing either. I feel my mouth curving upwords with the knowledge that Snow is dead. But then I look down to see the concrete slabs that held the children Prim had been helping. The rebels must have been the bombers, because this does not seem like a suicide bombing. And Snow's private hovercraft is destroyed, leaving out the possibility that he fled the scene before hand. And what is funny is that the only comforting thought is that Prim and Gale aren't alive to be tortured any more. I am so wrapped up in my thoughts that I don't even notice when a reptile mutt comes out of a smoking manhole.

Before I can even react, it has Peeta in it's arms and is slicing his throat. The world disappears. All reason diminished. All I know is that I have to kill the mutt and save Peeta. But before I can, Finnick is pulling me into one of the not-so scorched buildings and is trying to calm me. I scream profanities at him, but when I look through the gaping hole in the wall, I see Peeta is lying on the ground making soft noises; no, not noises. He is saying my name. "Katniss... I love you..." He gets that out right before I send an arrow flying into the mutt's eye. I ignore Finnick and run to Peeta. I take his hand in mine. "Katniss... I love you.." He repeats.

"I love you, Peeta." I say softly as tears stream down my cheeks. He closes his eyes, and I kiss his takes his final breath as Finnick reaches my side. My throat makes the weird noise it does when I cry hard. Finnick sit on Peeta's other side, holding his hand as well. Almost as if it were panned, we simultaneously put our three middle fingers on our left hands to our lips and hold them up in the air.

We carry him to the gaping hole back in the city circle. I kiss Peeta one last time. Say 'I love you' one last time. Then we toss him in. Now it's down to me and Finnick.

It takes A couple hours of navigating through the streets to find base camp. But when we do, we find that everyone is still there. All of the troops and tents. Nothing touched by bombs at all. We are welcomed back. We find the person in comand, a troop named Byla Coan. We tell her of what happened. How Boggs died, how we hid with Tigris. But Prim and Gale and Peeta's unfortunate end is what shakes her the most. She closes her eyes and shakes her head causing her blonde ringlets to bounce back and fourth. When she opens her eyes again, I notice how blue they are. She has the look of a merchants daughter. She does look familiar. Then I place her. Her parents ran the sweet shop in 12. She is my age. Young to be in charge, but then I am young to be the rebels MockingJay.

"We'll take you back to 13 immediatly for medical care." Byla says. She orders something to a pilot, then Finnick and I are escorted into a small hovercraft. I sleep the whole way.

I swim through blue water. It's warm and salty. When my head emerges, I find that I am starring at a metal plate. I look left, seeing another. Behind that, a strip of sand. The sky is pink. I look right, another strip of sand. _Where am I? _I think to myself. I look behind me, and see a large gold cornucopia sitting on an island. Beyond that, jungle._ Oh my god_. I know where I am. I am in the arena for the second quarter quell. my limps frantically flail about, sending water into my eyes, nose, mouth and ears. My head is throbbing. I close my eyes and sink down to the sandy ocean floor. The pain of a lack of oxygen registers in my mind. I open my eyes to see that I am in my old hospital room in 13. I have flash backs of the whole scene back in the Capital, up until the I turn around to see the ugly mutt crawling out of the manhole. _Where's Peeta? _I think to myself. I need to find him. I am not strapped in, so I sit up and move about the room for a mintue, working off the dizzyness caused by the morphling. I open the door to a long hallway. I see Finnick sitting on a bed reading a book in a room at the end. I decide I'll ask him where Peeta is. As I walk in the room, Finnick looks up at me.

"I see you're awake." He says flatly.

"Do you know where Peeta might be? I need to make sure he's okay." I say sounding nonchalant.

"Oh, Katniss..." Finnick says, his voice suddenly filled with sorrow.

"What?" I say worried.

"Peeta's..." there is a 10 second pause. "Peeta's gone.." He says sheepishly.

"What.. what happened after the mutt came out of the manhole?" I ask unsure that I want to know the answer.

"It got him.." he says.

All the memories come flooding back. Seeing the mutt slit Peeta's throat. Peeta's last words. Tossing him into an abyss. Finnick and I finding our way back. Byla shaking her blonde ringlets. "Oh." I say.

I turn around and wander down the halls. No one stops me. I find my hiding place in the school supplies closet. I sit there. Not crying or even breathing. I cover my mouth and nose with my shaking hand. The pain builds in my chest. Just as the world is slipping away, I see Peeta smiling at me. He is happy. I emerge into white flowers. I see my dad. I see Prim and Gale. And... Peeta. I also see Madge and Maysilee Donner, her aunt. I see... Haymitch? He must have had a bad withdrawl. I start to run twards them, opening my arms for a hug. Then I here a voice. _"Come on, Katniss.. Stay with me.." _I can't place who it is. After a mintue of standing there thinking back to all the voices I've heard, I know. It's Finnick. But Finnick isn't dead. I feel the sensation of hands on my chest, air being pushed in my lungs, and lips on my mouth. I am sucked back into the world of Panem. I open my eyes and see Finnick with his brows creased in concentration. I take in a breath and he stops pounding on my chest.

"Finnick? What are you doing?" I ask confused.

"What am I doing? What are you doing suffocating yourself?" He says accusingly.

"I saw Peeta. And Prim. And gale. Also my friend Madge and her aunt, Maysilee Donner." That is all I can really say.

"Katniss, I'm sorry." He looks down.

My mother enters the room, crying. She escorts me back to the hospital. I find Johanna. We victors (Johanna, Finnick, Annie, and me) stick together. We eat together. We work together. We watch out for eachother. I continue life in 13 with my friends. Every night I rub the pearl Peeta gave me in the quell over my lips, longing for him. Even on my last night. I know because of my old age that this is it. I say my last words.

"I'll see you soon, Peeta."

Once again, I enter the meadow. The same people wait for me, accompanied by Johanna, Annie, and Finnick. And my mother. I run to Peeta's arms.

"Stay with me?" I ask.

"Always." He replies.

THE END


End file.
